scruta

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Sunday, April 12, 2009

Superman Approximated

[Ferret has dinner with The Fongs, Super-Hero, and Pigeon. The dinner is winding down, and there is a lull in the conversation.]

Ferret

So, I have an important question.

The Fongs

Okay.

Ferret

Do you think Superman will still be a superhero if…

The Fongs

If what?

Ferret

If he was retarded?

The Fongs

Yeah, sure.

SuperHero

You mean, like really retarded? Or what?

Ferret

I mean, with all due respect, that sometimes he poops his pants.

The Fongs

But he still has all the same powers?

Ferret

Sure, except he can’t tie his shoes very well, and he has a strange affinity for soft things, you know… mentally deficient.

Pigeon

This is wrong.

Super-Hero

I don’t think he’d be a superhero.

The Fongs

Why not?

Super-Hero

I mean, can he still save people?

Ferret

Sure, but people have to tell him so that he can save them.

Super-Hero

If he needs people to tell him, then he’s not a superhero.

Ferret

But he doesn’t always need people to tell him. He’s trained – like a dog or something.

Super-Hero

I don’t know.

Ferret

I think he’d still be super, but all the other superheroes would make fun of him. It would make Superman a lot more interesting, other than that whole kryptonite thing. Superman saves the world from an asteroid, and learns to spell his name in the same story! Eh? Anyone with me?

posted by ferret at 1:37 am  

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