scruta

Either you are sorting it out, or you are full of it.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Li and Zhou: Dastardly Death

LI

So you remember that one magazine that always gave us trouble?

ZHOU

Which one?

LI

The expat one in Shanghai.

ZHOU

That’s Shanghai?

LI

No. Well, no. I don’t think so.

[LI looks at his monitor searching.]

LI

No. SH Magazine.

ZHOU

SH Magazine?

LI

Yeah, the one where they tried to print Sassy Pandez.

ZHOU

Mmm… Miss Panda. So what?

LI

What do you mean?

ZHOU

I mean, why do you bring it up?

LI

Well, it looks like they are going out of business and they want to print an issue with more problems than I can even begin to tell you.

ZHOU

Well, like what?

LI

Well, for starters, the whole thing is about death.

ZHOU

Death? How can they do that? They don’t even have a magazine license. You can’t sell death. Unless of course you are a funeral home.

LI

I know.

ZHOU

Or a memorial garden.

LI

Right.

ZHOU

Or a preacher.

LI

Um-hm.

ZHOU

Or an urn maker.

LI

Zhou.

ZHOU

Sorry. Well, what do they say?

LI

They have a tour of all of these different tombstones. Some guy rambles about drunken debauchery in a bar. They made an insert of paper foods to burn to dead ancestors at New Year.

ZHOU

That’s despicable! How could they think of doing that and get away with it?? I mean, I understand they are Westerners, and that they want to push boundaries, but this is ridiculous. They know traditions like that are off limits. Bastards…

LI

Yeah, I can tell they were pretty frustrated.

ZHOU

Well, so am I. Tell them that even if they clean it up they can’t print it!

LI

They’d have to rewrite the whole magazine. I don’t think it’s going to happen.

ZHOU

Good!

LI

Hmm.

ZHOU

Hey, Li.

LI

Yeah.

ZHOU

Print me off a copy. I want to read it.

LI

No worries. I’ve already printed out a couple. I think you’ll want to keep a copy of this.

R.I.P. SH Magazine

posted by ferret at 6:09 pm  

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