Either you are sorting it out, or you are full of it.

Saturday, April 3, 2010


Misinogist – n. a person who hates China

[Ferret is walking home from a bar in the French Concession near the American Consulate. As he walks by the Consulate, he notices that at the entrance there is a white guy flailing his arms around strangely, directly in front of the Guards from the People’s Liberation Army (PLA) on duty near the entrance. Ferret walks up closer to get a better look. He sees that the white guy, a Drunken Misinogist is doing kungfu in front of the very confused PLA guards. There is a Policeman looking at the Drunken Misinogist and talking on his walkie-talkie. The Drunken Misinogist remains unphased. Ferret walks up to a PLA Guard to ask him if he knows what is going on.]


[pointing on the Drunken Misinogist]


What is he doing?

PLA Guard

Good evening, sir. Please don’t be waiting here.



Okay, but what is he doing? How long has he been here?

PLA Guard

[realizing that Ferret is speaking to him in Chinese:]


Oh, I- I really don’t know. He’s been here about ten minutes.

[The Drunken Misinogist realizes that Ferret and the PLA Guard are talking about him. The Drunken Misinogist points at Ferret and shouts:]

Drunken Misinogist

Traitor! Traitor! I know you can speak English!

[Ferret looks at the Drunken Misinogist with amusement. The Drunken Misinogist begins to do his strange kungfu in front of the PLA Guards again.]

PLA Guard


I’m sorry, but can you help us make him go?


[really not wanting to get involved]


Sorry, but he’s drunk. There’s nothing I can do.

[Ferret shrugs, turns around and walks home.]

posted by ferret at 3:20 am  

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