Either you are sorting it out, or you are full of it.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

No Shame

[Ferret is on his way to a show with Goose to go see a show by a hip-hop has-been. As they walk up to the club, they see Two Drunken Laowai and Two Bums standing face to face making far too much noise. Their rantings become clearer as Ferret and Goose get closer:]

Drunken Laowai #1

Fuck off!

Bum #1


Bum #2

Fa-cof-a! Fa-cof-fa!

Drunken Laowai #2

[gesturing rudely away]

No! Fuck off! Don’t you understand? Fuck off!

Drunken Laowai #1

Fuck off!

Bum #1 and Bum #2

[in unison]


[The two pairs square off, screaming “Fuck off” back and forth, obtaining a cadence as if the Two Drunken Laowai were teaching the Two Bums a class in English pronunciation. The Two Drunken Laowai become more frustrated, while the Two Bums become more and more exhilarated. Ferret and Goose walk by, chuckling, and commenting soon after:]


Those guys just don’t understand.


What d’you mean?


I mean, it doesn’t matter what you say to those bums. They have no shame. It’s all a game to them. You could tell them to “Fuck off” in perfect Chinese, but they’ll still just laugh at you and ask you for money. That’s the point. You have no choice but to pretend that they don’t exist.


Yeah. Those drunken dudes kind’ve look like idiots.


That’s the funniest part. The bums’ revenge so to speak, by getting a rise out of those guys, the whole thing becomes a joke on them. It makes it look like those drunken laowai have no shame, either. Screaming “Fuck Off” over and over on a street corner in the middle of the night.

posted by ferret at 3:20 pm  

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